Grend the Splend

Young Grend was a Splend
Who hadn’t a friend –
                I’ll tell you his tale
                                As a Warning.
For most of the Splends
Had oodles of friends
                While Grend sat alone
                                Every morning.

But stubbornly Grend
Avoided the trend;
                “For friends are a bother
                                and boring.”
The truth was that Grend
Didn’t know how to friend;
                And if anyone passed
                                Sat ignoring.

He never did lend
Any trifle, nor penned
                Any message of cheer
                                Or a letter.
He’d never help mend
And he never did send
                Any gifts, for he thought
                                He knew better.

One day he did wend
Down the road, round a bend
                And then he saw someone
                                Before him.
And so he met Jend.
A lovely young Splend;
                But she just turned around
                                To ignore him.

“Oh, this is the end!”
Cried disconsolate Grend;
                “I think that this girl
                                “Is a wonder.
“My shirt I shall rend!
“And I shall descend
                “To my grave where I’ll be
                                “Six feet under.”

His life he’d upend
And his last days he’d spend
                In agonied grief
                                And in sorrow.
(Still hoping that Jend
Could perhaps make amend
                And maybe return
                                Here tomorrow.)

For hours on end
His life would depend
                On whether she’d come or
                                She wouldn’t.
In hope he did tend
To think little Jend
                Might fix that great ache that
                                He couldn’t.

Then suddenly Jend
Came right back round the bend;
                She approached him, her lovely
                                Face smiling;
“Here’s a pie, Mr Grend!”
He couldn’t defend;
                He found her so very
                                Beguiling.

And with his new Friend
His heart got to mend
                (Exactly the way Jend
                                Intended);
And so, in the end,
He admitted (did Grend)
                That being Befriended
                                Was Splendid!